Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Sarcasm Makes Me Smile

Today I was pumping gas and I heard the weather report being announced. I thought, wow, they report the weather over the speakers at the gas pumps now? Then I looked up and saw a big flat screen TV attached to the top of the gas pump! Is our society THAT addicted to TV that we even need televisions on our gas pumps??? Unless you are filling up a tanker or something, it's not like you are going to be there long enough to watch a full episode of a show. I can see it now, I am standing there pumping gas and become mesmerized by Oprah's new show and there are cars lined up behind me honking their horns in anger, yelling expletives out their windows and making obscene hand gestures in my general direction. Then I'll be like, "Hey! Have a little courtesy why don't ya?! I'm trying to watch a program here!" Is that why our gas prices are getting so high, because we have to finance our own unnecessary entertainment? What about the TVs that are in the check out lanes in the stores now? Now I can try to watch TV and keep my kid from jacking something off the candy shelf at the same time--I really need distractions like that. Thanks to that damn TV my kid is going to land in juvenile hall over a pack of gum because I couldn't tear my attention away from a really good rerun of the Cosby show long enough to notice her pocketing that pack of strawberry Hubba-Bubba. Our cars come with TVs on the ceiling or on the backs of the seats complete with DVD and video game hook ups. Air planes have TVs dangling overhead or embedded in the backs of their seats too. Classrooms have televisions, doctor's waiting rooms and exam rooms now have TVs instead of magazines. Most homes have TVs in about every room! They even have them built to install under cabinets to go in the kitchen and in bathrooms. Our cell phones now get live television feeds so we can watch TV on our phones, our lap tops, our I-Pods, our watches!!!!! It feels like we can't go anywhere without a TV staring us down and demanding our attention. How did people a few generations ago survive without having a TV up their ass at every turn? Did they, dare I say, read? Maybe they talked to each other. Perhaps they had moments of quiet reflection. Fewer kids had ADHD and fewer parents weren't looking when their kid snuck that Bazooka gum into their pocket because they REALLY wanted the tattoo inside, but Mom said no. I know our world is becoming wired more and more every day, but I really think our obsession with media is becoming an epidemic. That being said, I gotta go and check my TIVO to make sure it recorded that show I missed while I was out pumping gas....

2 comments:

Dewdrop said...

Awesome post! You should submit that to your local paper for an opinion column... SERIOUSLY!

Queen Annie said...

Thanks! Scott says I sound like the next Paul Harvey or Andy Rooney (sp?). LMAO