Midnight Misadventures

The other night my dutiful watch by the window was rewarded when the ducks came waddling up the trail in all their web-footed splendor at 8:53 PM. I stayed up late working on homework and watching TV and I was just getting ready for bed when the dog started barking at midnight. I went outside in my pajamas with a flashlight to make sure nothing was after the animals. After seeing that nothing was amiss, I returned to the house, only to find that I was locked out. Great. I was in the middle of nowhere in my pajamas in the middle of the night, locked out. So I started knocking on the door--the answer was simple enough--all I had to do was knock on the door, wake up Katie and she could let me in. She didn't wake up. So I started pounding on the door--nothing. I walked around to her window and knocked on the window--she didn't even stir. I started banging on the window so hard I was afraid I might break the glass--still no response. I banged even harder, yelled her name and flashed the flashlight in and out of her window--still no success. Why the hell can't I ever sleep that soundly?! So I decide I can just go get a screwdriver from my Dad's tool box and take the door knob off. I get to the door, screwdriver in hand and find that are no screws around the knob....nice. I go back to the tool box, get a bondo blade, and decide I will just jimmy the lock. I start wiggling the door knob so I can see exactly where to insert the blade and the damn door pops open! Feeling both frustrated and relieved I put my Dad's tools back and went inside to bed. I learned two things that night, 1) when Katie is sleeping, if there is ever an emergency, nothing short of an air horn and a bucket of ice water is going to get her attention and 2) I really should have paid more attention when I worked at the juvenile detention center because in the event that you need to get into a place that seems inaccessible, you really need to be able to access a situation from a criminal point of view. I also kept hearing a saying (I learned when I worked for the Humane Society) in the back of my mind: No good deed goes unpunished. That's what I get for rushing out to save animals from a terrible demise in the middle of the night--locked out. So I have to stop and wonder, if there really are past lives, what did I do in mine to piss God off so much....